This is the perfect love!

A story revealing practical marriage and relationship tips. It tells whom one should marry, what to do to keep the embers alive and lots more. Dating. James Polamz Blog
By James Polamz King

You all know I got wedded recently. And that day is the happiest day of my life! Life hasn't been so fair to me, but it is in my marriage.

Oh look at him, so handsome. His eyebrows are hewed perfectly, his lips fitted and paralleled to his smooth nose. Oh my! look at those smiles, how handsome he is, even in his sleep.

Alaba is such a wonderful man. Blessed be the day I met him. Just like yesterday, but it's been two years since we first met at Obudu cattle ranch in the southern part of Nigeria. That beautiful place got me my beautiful marriage. It's funny how we got talking.


It happened that my friend, Abidun needed to withdraw from the ATM station, but was delayed by a guy who kept on withdrawing. In annoyance, I went over to the guy. I was going to talk, scream, shout, shriek, and burst all at once.

As I was going to execute my noble mission, he turned and I froze. Standing before me is the cutest guy I've ever set my large eyes on. My scream turned into an ice cream, my shout to a smile, my shriek to a silence and my burst to a butter.

I was literarily ambivalent. I found myself doing the very opposite of my thoughts. I wanted to shout, but my medulla signaled a smile -- I was swooned.

"What?" He aksed in the most scintillating voice ever, I became nervy the more. "Not- nothing." I smiled like a moron in love.

"Kike, are you all right? Why are you looking like a moron?" My ever reasonable friend questioned tappping me, perhaps to tap me out of this fairy scene I found myself in unprecedentedly.

She was right, I was a moron in love. And by the way, how did she know what I was thinking? That can wait till later anyway. I kept on looking as the guy went over to a nice flashy car, his I guess.

I averted my eyes when the guy looked back, but too late, our eyes have met already. We were supposed to leave immediately we cashed out, but I just can't leave, no, not after what has just happened.

I cooked up spicy excuses just to delay and buy more time, but my friend wasn't hungry, but rather, angry.

 "Abidun, it's like we've not visited the presidential lodge? I aksed.

"We have!" She retorted. Obviously angry at the way I reacted at the ATM station. It wasn't my fault after all.

I pushed further. "Really? But must we go now, why the hurry?" She looked at me from head to toe like I have just told her 'I'm a prostitute.'

"See who's talking! Were you not the one some minutes ago squeezing the life out of me to hurry up?" She shook her head.

I dragged my words along with my hands, "yessssss I did but that's humans for you, we change, you know."

As God would have it, rain started drizzling and we made for a nearby restaurant, and guess who was there?

One thing led to the other, one plus one equal to something and friendship blossomed until we married last month.

And ever since then, we've been enjoying one another. Marriage is just perfect! And in case you're thinking you don't want to marry, change your mind.

Now, am not saying things have been fine or perfect. But I can vouch that a perfect love can harmonize two imperfect individuals. I must confess, I have gotten some shockers too and have woken up from my fantasy of a Disney kind of a marriage.

I thought, like the film 'Frozen' our house will always be neat. The floor will clean itself, the plates will wash themselves. And the beds will lay themselves.

 But how wrong I was! I am the one laying the beds. And thanks to Alaba, the villain (laughs - I hope he doesn't get to see this), he pretty knows how to scatter the beds.

He likes jumping on the bed and pushing me on the bed too. He can forget his shoes and clothes anywhere. I even picked his shoes from the bathroom yesterday.

Also, he doesn't like the toilet lid to be left opened, whereas, I like it opened. He eats outside, well, used to eat outside a lot, but now, just in the afternoon. He says as an Engineer, he will have to. But we've reached a compromise on that.

Now all these happen because of individual differences, and they are no big deals if the two lovebirds will sit down in their romantic nest to discuss things and reach a compromise bearing in mind that love is unselfish.

In marriage, farting is allowed. A lot of people don't fart during courtship, good for you. When you marry, you will know what am taking about.

Now am not saying you should take advantage of your dirtiness and start dropping soundless gases here and there. Am just saying, it's just necessary to be very open and plain to the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with. Reasonable rght?

Whatever you are doing now in courtship is what you will be doing in marriage. For example, Alaba and I prayed, studied our Bibles together before marriage. We even had vigils via phones, so it's no problem for us now.

Truth is, you can't fully know your partner during courtship, but you can know enough to know he or she is the one for you.

Don't fall in love before making your decisions prayerfully. As a matter of fact, love is a decision and not just feelings. You choose to love. Yes there could be a serious admiration or crush at first sight, but as a Christian, subject your feelings to the new creature empowered by God in you.

Like what happened to us, Alaba later told me that he liked me the first time he set his eyes on me too. But we didn't rush things, we were friends first, and we took time in knowing each other. One thing that helped us was that we never joked with communication.

Your partner should be your best friend! As a matter of fact, you should marry a friend. This will really help your marriage. Of course, not everyone will marry a friend or someone they grew up with, however, you can befriend each other once you agree to have something together. It's just commitment and decision it will gulp.

Be proud of your partner and let them know it. While love is unconditional, trust and respect are earned. Avoid things that will cause distrust. Be plain and carry your partner along in little things.

Before I go back to sleep with my Alaba, my best friend, my king, and the love of my life; remember this, perfect love cast out fears no matter what size or frequency your fears are. Loving your partner in the good and the bad times is the perfect love.

Bye and do have a blissful  marriage in life.


Picture credit: Divalishus (Pinterest)



Comments

  1. I loved reading this! I like the fact that it started jokingly and got more spiritual and insightful as it proceeded. God bless you and may He continue to use you to inspire Christians!��- Zulayka

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    Replies
    1. Thanks so much my beautiful friend, Zulayka. I hope you'll forgive my late reply. I've been very busy! You must have noticed too on Instagram. Thanks once again.

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